Tuesday, March 22, 2011

New Theory

You know how sometimes you wake up before you have to because you have GOT to pee?  You pretty much have two options: Stay in bed and hope that you can sleep through it without waking up soaked in your own urine OR get up and pee.  I typically get up and pee.

My theory is that when you do this, your bladder only expels as much as it needs to in order for you to be comfortable enough to get back to sleep.  Because seriously, no matter when it happens, I STILL have to pee first thing when I get up.  So unless I'm sleep-drinking, my bladder clearly isn't getting emptied that first time around.

This has been a random theory by yours truly.  Have a good day!

Friday, March 18, 2011

A Simpler Time

So, things have gotten a bit stressful these past few weeks, with no intention of letting up until next month.  Oof.  Between a mandatory work meeting, an upcoming trip to visit my 80-year old grandpa in Mississippi and tons of work for my classes (including a paper, an exam, and several chapters of reading), I'm ready to go back to being a kid for awhile.  

You know what I'm talking about, right?  The hardest decision of the day would be shoes with laces or velcro.  Dinner would be on the table, already made and tasty to boot.  Homework would take 15 minutes (tops) and going outside was the fun part of the day.  I'm badly wishing I could do a reverse Big.

Since that's not an option (there's not a Zoltar machine in view), the only thing I can do is listen to music that takes me back to a simpler time.  Without further ado, here are 5 songs from my iTunes library that always make me feel like a kid again:

1) 4 Non Blondes - "What's Up?" I can clearly remember this song being played at every single middle school dance that I attended.  Whenever I hear it, I just find myself swaying back and forth and singing as loud as I can, "And I say heeeeeey-yaaaaay-yaaaaay-yaa-haaaay, heeeeeeey-yaaaaaay-yaaaaay.  I say hey, what's going on?"  (As a side note, this song also reminds me of my one night at Karaoke Kid...  someone did this song and the whole bar burst into song at the chorus; it was magical.)

2) Carole King - "You Make Me Feel (Like A Natural Woman)" As my dad once told a boyfriend of mine (after a few drinks), "Picture this: 3-year-old Erika.  Flat-chested as a boy.  Belting out 'You Make Me Feel (Like A Natural Woman)' in her carseat!"  Embarrassing as that moment was for me, it's all true.  Anytime I hear this song, I almost feel like I'm back in the car with my mom on the way home from one of dad's softball games trying not to fall asleep before we pull into the garage. 
3) The Jackson 5 - "I'll Be There"  When I was younger, there were only two movies in my life: Now & Then and Clueless (and yes, I have the soundtracks for both).  My best friend and I used to sing along to virtually every song in Now & Then, but we always had a thing for this song in particular.  "Just call my naaaaame-buh, and I'll be there."  No, I'm not sure why we added a 'B' sound to the end of name.  That's just how we rolled.

4) The Beatles - "Michelle"  This probably sounds like a strange one, but it makes sense to me.  Remember those Saturday morning classes that some of your parents probably made you take?  Well, when I was 8, my parents wanted me to sign up, so I picked French.  We really didn't learn much except the very basics, but it was fun.  One day I was listening to my dad's Beatles tapes and "Michelle" came on.  I recognized the phrase, "très bien" since this was something our teacher said to us when we got something right (it means "very good").  So I asked my mom (who had taken French in high school) what the rest of the line was.  Once I learned a whole sentence in French, I was on top of the world.  I still feel pretty cool when I sing along today.

5) Big Bird & Waylon Jennings - "Ain't No Road Too Long"  This one is classic.  I grew up on Follow That Bird (this has been brought up in the past, and will no doubt appear in later posts).  My sisters* (including my best friend) all baby sat for me at one point or another, and all were subjected to this movie multiple times.  I hear this song, and I can picture being in the basement at my parents' house, piling pillows and blankets on the floor to bounce on while singing along with Big Bird.  If that's not bliss, I'm not sure what is.

So what songs remind you of being a kid?

Hope everyone has a happy Friday and a wonderful weekend!  :-)    

*Technically, I'm an only child.  But if you ask me, I have 3 awesome big sisters (who are all actually sisters) that I grew up with.  We might not be blood-related, but we're definitely family. 

Thursday, March 17, 2011

5 Reasons The Day After St. Patrick's Day Should Be A National Holiday

1) People won't need to call in hungover (er, "sick").  Many people use St. Patty's Day to drink themselves into a stupor.  This is fact.  Thus, I have to assume that a number of people call in sick the day after.  That means that the rest of us have to work extra hard to make up for their absences, and that just blows.

2) It's a wasted day.  Those that DO come in hungover are clearly not going to be on their A game, but don't want to use a sick day or paid time off when they can just slack off on the company's dime.  Again, those of us who didn't render ourselves useless may have to work harder (boooo-urns) or will just sit around talking about the adventures the others had the day before.

3) It's just time for a break.  Many of us haven't had a holiday off since New Year's Day.  It's about damn time, so why not the day after St. Patty's?  Otherwise we have to wait until Memorial Day, which feels like for-ev-er.  We're getting restless, which means productivity could be dropping.  Why risk it?

4) I have two words: Spring Fever.  The weather is finally getting nice enough to enjoy!  Let us have a day to actually enjoy it instead of staring longingly out the window wishing we were enjoying it.

5) Not everyone is Irish, but most everyone can agree that a day off is a good thing.  We can call it People Appreciation Day or Random Day Off Day.  I don't care.  I doubt anyone will care.  Just do it.  

Wednesday, March 16, 2011

Maxine McPupperkins

We all know I love my dog.  I'm a proud puppy parent!  It happens.

Anywhoozles, if you love my dog, your own dog, any dog, all dogs, any animal, ALL animals, etc...  Please vote for Miss Maxine as Bissell's MVP here.

I really don't care about Maxi being on some Bissell box, but the $10,000, $5,000 or $1,000 for her rescue shelter would be beyond fabulous!  Bichon & Little Buddies rescue was a life-saver for Maxine, and they never gave up on her.  We're so thankful they didn't!! 

You can vote once per day for a whole week, so mark your calendars, set your alarms, and vote, vote, vote!!  :-)

Monday, March 14, 2011

To Whom It May Concern

I do not want children.  Before I move on, let that soak in.  I do NOT want children.

That being said, I want to point out a few things:
  • Not every married couple wants kids.  Strange, I know.  But I didn't get married with the purpose of starting a family.  I got married because I love my husband and want to spend the rest of my life with him.  Period.  
  • I don't hate children.  On the contrary - I think most kids are great!  I worked in day care when I was younger and was a camp counselor for a number of summers, so I think it's safe to say that I like kids just fine. 
  • Just because you see me playing with/holding/talking to a child, doesn't mean I've changed my mind.  Should I assume that everyone who pets my dog wants one?  Because I don't.  I just assume they're enjoying my dog because they can.  Same thing for me with a child.  I'm just enjoying the time with him or her; doesn't mean I'm going to run home and make one of my own.
  • Asking a couple when they're going to have kids is just plain rude in my opinion.  
    • There are many couples like us who don't want them, and whenever I have to answer that question, things get awkward for someone.  Every time I hear, "You'll change your mind," or "Just wait until you're older," I want to punch someone in the nose.  How the hell do you know what future Erika is about?  I don't even know for sure what future Erika wants!  And I'm Erika!!  
    • Also, how do you know that a couple hasn't been trying for kids?  Just because they don't have them yet doesn't mean they don't want them.  No matter what the situation, someone could come away feeling hurt, confused, angry, sad, etc.  There's no need for that.
  • Whether you like it or not, my dog is, effectively, my child.  She is my baby girl and I love her with all my heart.  So what if she hates baths, pees on the carpet, and chews on things she shouldn't?  Kids do the same, and much worse!  (Besides, if my dog ever gets away, I can post fliers to get help finding her.  Try that with a missing kid... I'm sure that'll end well.  "Lost: One small child.  Blond hair, green eyes, answers to 'Martha', Call if found.")
This really isn't directed at anyone in particular, but maybe you can relate somehow.  Nonetheless, I feel better now.  Ta ta!

Sunday, March 13, 2011

Spring Break Weekend

I've technically been on spring break for the past week.  It's not nearly as exciting when you're still working full time, but them's the breaks.  

Anywhoozles, we did have ourselves a tropical night on Friday so I could pretend I was somewhere far away and warm.  We had surf and turf kabobs (made on our George Foreman grill), our normal tropical salad with homemade pineapple vinaigrette dressing, and some tropical style drinks.  Our tropical movie selection for the night was Joe Versus the Volcano, which is a fantastic little movie, if not all that tropical (they're only on the island for a bit toward the end of the movie, but oh well).  All in all, a good night was had. 

Our original plans for Saturday were to go exploring around Cedarburg for the afternoon, since it was a recent feature in the paper's "Weekend Getaway" part of the Travel section.  But, we woke up to find that the weather wasn't being so cooperative.  22-28 mph winds, some rain, many clouds...  Boo.  

Instead, we went to IHOP for breakfast and then went to Menards to shop for a bit.  Not exactly a romantic day together, but still fun.  I had the Nutella crepes at IHOP, with the bananas and strawberries and whipped cream... OMG, so good.  I also go a side order of turkey bacon, which I LOVE.  We also had our favorite waiter there (not that we're regulars; we just happened to have him the last time we were there, which was probably January).  This guy is awesome.  Seriously!  He has a positive attitude about everything, and his memory must be phenomenal.  He took our orders (didn't write them down) and then went to chat with the table behind us for a bit, and I kept thinking, shit, something is going to get fucked up.  Either Hubby's eggs will be wrong or I won't get my turkey bacon or something.  But I should've remembered just how awesome he is, because he came out later with our order just as perfect as could be.  At the end of the meal, he handed me the check and said, "You're married; I know who has the money here!  I'm married and have 4 kids - I don't get to see any money!"  We joked about how he doesn't get asked about his day when he gets home, just how much money he made for the day.  The thing is, maybe I'm completely naive, but I really just think he's trying to have fun with his customers, not trying to get sympathy or extra tips.  He really just seems like a good guy who's making the best out of life.  It's inspiring to me, and so that's how I choose to see it.  

Menards was...  Menards.  You have to understand that I hated...  No...  I loathed Menards growing up.  It was the most boring place on Earth.  No contest.  The only things there that kept me from going insane were the doorbell section (I loved the different noises they all made) and the door section (where I would open and close doors, wandering through them like it was some kind of maze for me to get through).  When I got a little older, I would just bring my Walkman in with me and listen to my cassette tapes while we wandering through the store.  My parents (or, more specifically, my father) were always looking at the most boring things, and music kept me entertained.  These days, I actually don't mind Menards, but I still hold some of that resentment.  I mean, I was clearly old enough at some points to have stayed home by myself for an hour or two, but instead my parents dragged me along to Hell.  Maybe they thought the torture was character-building.  Who knows.  

Anywhoozles, we ended up watching most of the Band of Brothers marathon on Spike last night while we cuddled on the couch and ate our dinner.  Hubby got the grill out last night for our steaks.  The first grill of the season was definitely a success.  Man, I love a good rib-eye on the grill!  Droooooooool.  

Today, the hubs is off to help his dad get some things done, so it's just me and the pooch.  I'm sure I'll end up doing fascinating things like laundry or homework or sleeping.  No matter what, I had a great weekend. :-)  

Wednesday, March 9, 2011

Hump Day - Fuck Me Gently With A Chainsaw

Or, in this case, with a Fucksaw.  Yes, you read that correctly.  I said fucksaw.
Imagine you're in class.  It's Human Sexuality, so you're bound to get some graphic details here and there, right?

Now imagine there's a naked woman in front of the class on whom a sex toy is being demonstrated.  Awkward!

I mean, even if that kind of thing floats your boat, how weird would the whole situation be?  Maybe if it was just you and the naked woman, sure.  Or even you, the naked woman and a third party (sharing is caring?).  But it's you, the naked woman, the demonstrator, a class full of other students, the professor, maybe a TA or two...  Yeah, any chance of that being anything less than exceedingly awkward went right out the window.

If nothing else, you'll never look at a saw the same again.

Monday, March 7, 2011


So Friday night I wanted to have a Mexican food night.  To be honest, I just wanted an excuse to have guacamole.  I loves me some guac!  So, I hunted down some good looking recipes for entrees and off we went to Sendik's for ingredients.

There are two things you should know about me: 1) I love going to the grocery store with my hubby.  Mostly.  When he starts playing with the cart like it's a race car, I tend to get a bit annoyed, but otherwise, it's actually something I enjoy doing.  2) I especially love grocery shopping at Sendik's.  For anyone who hasn't been to Sendik's, I highly suggest it.

Sadly, I was a bit disappointed by our Sendik's trip.  They didn't have pre-made guac, for one.  Really?  I can go to most any Pick n Save and find already made guac.  Sometimes it's already packaged for me, too.  Step it up, Sendik's!

For another, NONE of their normal avocados were ripe.  We had managed to find a guac mix ("Just add avocados!") and figured we'd give it a try.  But the avocado selection was less than stellar.  They were like bumpy green stones.  Not cool.  We spent six dollars getting two "organic" avocados (and justified it by saying we weren't getting any other ingredients for it, like onions, tomatoes, etc).  It ended up being pretty tasty, but still.  

For dinner, we made chimichangas.  Here's the recipe.  I was seriously surprised that this recipe was as easy as it was, AND it was tasty!  We substituted ground turkey for the ground beef (as we almost always do) and I melted some cheese over the top of the chimis, but otherwise followed the recipe pretty closely.  With a little taco sauce and some sour cream on top...  Mmmmmmm...  Now I'm getting hungry, dammit.

Anywhoozles, just thought I'd share a good food experience with y'all.  :-)  This weekend we're going for another tropical night, so stay tuned!  

Friday, March 4, 2011

Money, Money, Money

I'm pretty sure most of us dream about being rich from time to time.  I mean, I don't think I can count how many times I've asked my hubby, "Can we just win the lottery?"  (Problem with that being one cannot win the lottery if one doesn't buy lottery tickets...)

What would you do if you had unlimited funds?  Or won a shit ton of money?  I'm really lame, but my first move would be to pay off our loans, mortgage, etc.  Being out from that debt would be magnificent.  I think after that I'd pay for my tuition up front, as well.  No more student loans for this lady!  (HA!)  Then I think we would buy a house with more space (particularly outside) so we could adopt a bunch of dogs and have plenty of room for them to run and play*.  

It would also seem necessary to blow some of the money on something ridiculous and fun and crazy and whatever else.  I'm sure a car or two (or six) would be part of that.  Maybe a hovercraft.  (Who doesn't want a hovercraft?)  Possibly a live-in chef.  Oh!  And all the camera equipment a girl could ever need.  :-)

The possibilities are seemingly limitless, and everyone has their own ideas.  In case you need some more ideas, here are some songs that might be able to help!
Travie McCoy (featuring Bruno Mars) - "Billionaire"  Mr. Gym Class Heroes has quite the list of things he'd do with all his money, including playing basketball with the president, having his own talk show, and giving away cars at random.  Some of the things are clearly self-motivated (being on Forbes, for example), but a lot of it is actually kind of sweet.  Bruno Mars lends his beautiful voice to serenade us between verses, which makes it totally worth listening to.  Even if you can't stand this song, you have to admit that he has some interesting ideas here... 
Ingrid Michaelson - "You And I"  A bit on the sappy side, this sweet song still has some unique ideas for your new-found fortune, like providing people with sweaters and dancing lessons.  Especially adorable if you and your S.O. have your own dreams of getting rich together.     
Barenaked Ladies - "If I Had A Million Dollars"  Quite possibly my favorite song on the list, this song is more about buying things for someone else, rather than yourself.  From buying a house and furniture to animals and Kraft dinners to a fur coat and a green dress (but not a real green dress; that's cruel), this song covers it all. 
"If I Were A Rich Man" from Fiddler On The Roof  There are a handful of musicals that everyone must see at some point in their lives.  Fiddler is near the top of that list.  If you haven't seen it, shame on you.  Go get it.  Now!  Anywhoozles, this song is all about the things the main character would do and have if he were rich (as he says, "...it's no shame to be poor.  But it's no great honor, either.")  This song really puts some things into perspective, particularly compared to some of the ridiculous things from the other songs. 
Abba - "Money, Money, Money"  This one's not as much about what one would do with their money, but more about lamenting that it must be nice to be rich.  I'm sure most of us can relate.  Not that we're all whining about not being rich, but most of us have likely uttered, "Must be nice..." a few times.

A few that I didn't put on the list, but (at least loosely) fit the theme as well:
Gwen Stefani - "If I Were A Rich Girl"  Yes, this is a complete rip off of "If I Were A Rich Man" but it's still catchy. 
The Beatles - "Money (That's What I Want)"  This song has been redone to death, but The Beatles just make me smile.  
"Money, Money" from Cabaret  Another great (if not a bit odd) song from a wonderful musical.

Got any to share?  Leave a comment! :-)

Here's to a great Friday and a wonderful weekend!  Enjoy!

*See, Hubby and I have this dream of running a kind of haven for older dogs.  Older dogs are the last to get adopted (if they get adopted at all), which just breaks our hearts.  So we want to be able to adopt them, and give them a good home for the rest of their lives, whether that be a few weeks, months, or years.  Yes, I realize that this would be a bit heart-breaking, but we both really feel that all dogs deserve a good home and to spend their days happy and loved.  We're big saps like that.


Wednesday, March 2, 2011

In The Ayer

Oh hot damn, this is my jam.

Anywhoozles, it's been awhile, so I thought I'd stop in and say hello to the world.  

Hello, world!

That being said, I'm quite ready for spring.  I know it's only March 2nd, but I'm ready for sunshine and flowers and greenery.  Well, in all fairness, I do have the sunshine.  For the moment, anyway.  But the others would really make life much nicer.  

Also, hubby and I just got DVR.  It's an amazing thing and may actually be my undoing.  Time will tell.