Christmas 2012: We Survived (Part 1)

Not the Mayan apocalypse; I already planned on surviving that. But the rest of the holiday, I just wasn't sure.

Let's go back to last Wednesday, the 19th. Things were going fine until I got a call from my mom. She had three things to tell me, and none of them were terribly positive. 

The first was that because of the snow Madison was about to get on Thursday, no one was going to be able to pick my Grampa up from the airport here in Milwaukee. OK, no big deal, we can handle that. Mom booked him a hotel room (we don't have a proper guest room, and I doubt Grampa wanted to sleep on our sleeper sofa or the futon) and all we had to do was pick him up when his flight landed on Thursday around 3:50. Sweet. Sad that Grampa would have to spend the night in a hotel in MKE, but at least we could help.

The second was that Mam-maw (my dad's mom) - who is staying with my parents right now - had gotten in on the 15th, but had already been in the hospital. Ugh. She was dehydrated and sick, but fortunately my dad was able to go pick her up that afternoon and take her back to their house. Again, not good that she was sick, but good that she was being released.

The third had no up-side. My aunt's husband (my uncle through marriage) had been in a car accident and had died. That one made my heart ache. My aunt is one of the nicest, sweetest people you could know (a lot like Mom) and to know something so terrible had happened made the world seem wrong. Even worse was when I found articles online about the accident; it wasn't really a car wreck, it was a "freak accident" that killed him. There are so many questions that might never get answered, and I'm afraid the hurt will stick around for a long, long time.

On Thursday, the snow storm hit Madison, but we only got rain here for most of the day. Regardless, Grampa's flight ended up getting canceled, and Mom had to make arrangements for him to stay at the airport in Orlando and to get another flight booked (which meant Mom was on hold for almost an hour and a half). After my lunch break, Hubby asked me to check our basement for flooding, since  a coworker of his was having some issues. I ran downstairs to check, didn't find any water, and came back to work, only to find that my internet was out. Poor Hubby spent about 2 hours trying to help me troubleshoot (via text and phone call), but to no avail. He called our provider, but they couldn't get out to the house until 2 PM on Friday. Great. There goes the rest of my work week.

Even better was when the guy came and figure out what had happened. Our internet amplifier is in the basement and, for whatever reason, is hooked up to a light switch in the back room. (See where this is going?) When I had gone down to check on the flooding situation, I had flipped the switch, but when nothing happened, I assumed the bulb was out and I just moved on. Instead, I had essentially turned off our connection. (Insert facepalm here.) Thankfully, it turned out that had been only part of the problem; we also had a cable that had gone bad, and had he not figured that out, I might've gone insane trying to make our internet work on my desktop. Aye yi yi.

On the plus side, I got to spend Friday wrapping presents and finishing up crafts. I watched a couple of movies on demand (Mr. Poppers Penguins was pretty sweet) and cleaned some things up a bit. That cleared up some time on Saturday, which means I had time to make all 3 kinds of cookies I'd set out to bake. I made Oreo truffles, peppermint pinwheels, and meringue cookies with mini M&Ms (they were out of the dark chocolate and mint pieces by the time we went shopping). Unlike last year's meringue cookies, these didn't turn out to be globs of gooey messiness, so that was nice. And the Oreo truffles are kind of like crack (my dad told my family that the first one's free, but the rest are $20 each). And Mom really liked the pinwheels, which made me happy. Saturday evening, K got into town, and that night, she and S came by and we went out for dinner. I love having time with my sisters, and dinner was just what I needed.

Sunday we drove into Madison. Our original plan was to have our traditional dinner and gift exchange with K that night, but instead we went to my uncle's visitation and funeral. It was actually nice to spend some time with my family and it wasn't nearly as uncomfortable as I'd imagined (except for the chairs, which were terribly uncomfortable; Hubby's leg even went numb at one point). We also got to have some awesome Italian food after the service (thank you, Biaggi's!), some of which we got to take home as leftovers. That night, we had a fire in the family room and sat around to enjoy it, just Mom, Dad, Hubby, Mam-maw and I. 

Christmas Eve Day meant more cookies! My mom made the traditional sugar cookie dough, and I rolled it out, used the cookie cutters and baked them up. While we let them sit, Hubby and I headed to grab some lunch (more Italian food; I'm not Italian, but I think my taste buds are) and then to the grocery store where K and S were ringing bells for the Salvation Army. Mom gave me $5 to donate (I give my money elsewhere) and we picked up some raisin bread for Mam-maw. When we got home, I made frosting and Hubby and I decorated the sugar cookies. We got to relax for a bit after that, and then eventually we opened presents (before dinner this year; another tradition broken). Hubby got me season 1 of Sherlock on DVD, Dumbo on blu-ray, and a couple other fun things. I also got a puzzle, a beautiful scarf, and we got a ginormous generator. Dad told us the idea was originally for camping, but that the unit he got was a bit bulkier than he anticipated, so we were given the option of keeping it or returning it to Gander Mountain and using the money for other camping stuff. (We're not 100% decided yet, but I think we're leaning toward returning it and getting a new tent and some other things.) Everyone seemed to be happy with their presents, and that's all I could really hope for.

More to come.

Jeff-fa-fa Dun-ham

Last night, Hubby and I went to the Wisconsin State Fair with one main purpose: Jeff Dunham.  But, we also wandered around a bit, taking in some of the other sights and sounds of the fair.

Hubby needed some dinner, so we walked around the food stands until he found something that screamed, "Eat me!"  I wasn't feeling the best, so I just grabbed a Sprite.  Sitting on the curb so Hubby could eat, we realized the rain was picking up a bit, rather than tapering off as we had hoped.  Once he was done, we headed off to the horticulture building, where we took a look at some of the prize-winning photos, food and plants.  When we got back outside and it was still raining, we sought shelter in the products building.

The products building should really be called the Noms building, IMO.  The vast majority of booths in this building are dedicated to different foods from the state.  It's not at all like the booths outside, where everything is deep-fried, on a stick, or both.  Inside, you can buy bottled honey and cherry preserves and all sorts of yummy foodstuffs to take home and enjoy later.  They do have some ready-to-eat food as well, but the food inside always sounds much better to me than the majority of things outside.  They have a grilled cheese sandwich station, a baked potato booth, bison burgers, and Palermo's pizza, to name a few.  

While wandering this building, we actually ran into my brother-in-law and his wife (as well as her family, including my nephew).  It was nice to see them, but little A was getting hungry, and so we parted ways pretty quickly.  By the time I checked my phone, it was already 7:48...  Almost time for Jeff Dunham.

For those unfamiliar, the main stage at the state fair is the Milwaukee Mile.  Yep.  It's a race track.  Better yet, it's uncovered, and it was raining.  Not hard or anything, but raining nonetheless.  This was my first grievance.  

My second was our seats.  Hubby had let me get tickets for Jeff Dunham only if we got the cheap seats.  So, I tried to pick the best cheap seats I could.  I got seats in the 3rd tier of the stands (cheap seats were 3rd and 4th tiers), as center to the stage as I could, and got us seats 1 and 2 so we were on the end.  As we went to find our seats (the second time, as we went up the wrong stairs the first time), the woman helping us said, "Those are good seats!"  I was pleased.  Until I sat down, and this was my view:

Seriously?  There was a giant fence blocking my view of the track/stage.  Nothing warned me they were obstructed view seats, nor were they any cheaper than the seats next to us who had no fence in their way at all.  I understand it's a race track, but they have shows there every night of the state fair.  That makes it a venue.  And the fact that I couldn't see the stage pissed me off.  Thankfully, I could see the giant screens they had set up, but I was still pissy.

Until the show really got started.  And then I forgot all about the fence.  I felt like I was at home watching a special on TV, and I laughed until my stomach hurt, and then laughed some more.  The rain stopped at some point, but I'd mostly forgotten about it anyway.  

After showing off some terribly awesome photos of himself from middle and high school, Jeff talked a bit about his divorce (sad panda!!), and Walter begged to know what it was like.  Achmed (the dead terrorist) had some issues keeping his legs in line once his son came out to join the show and eventually got duct taped to the stool.  Jose Jalapeno (on a steeeeck!) slammed Peanut with some great insults, and Peanut himself showed off his newly found talent of ventriloquism with his dummy Little Ugly AssJeff.  

My favorite part of watching Jeff is that you forget there's only one real person on stage.  The man is talking to himself, but save for the few times the dummies point out that it's really just him, you don't even notice that his right hand is missing for most of the show.  The illusion is magical, and if you think ventriloquists are lame, you just haven't seen the right one.

The funniest part, though, had to be Peanut reading a fan's email (OK, it may have been made up, but who cares) and tricking Jeff into being just as racist as he was being.  Effing love the fact that Peanut can make Jeff feel uncomfortable.  

I was surprised that Bubba J wasn't part of this show (we were on a race track, FCOL), but it was just as well.  Walter, Achmed and Peanut are clearly the crowd favorites, and though we had fun, a longer show might have gotten old.     

All in all, I'm so glad we went.  Though it was an entirely different experience than last week's Daniel Tosh show, I think I laughed just as much last night as I did at Tosh (though it was more of a "Hehe, that was silly and fun" type show than an "OMG this is wrong, but so f*ckin' funny" kind of show).  

Jeff's new special airs on Comedy Central this September, so check it out!  You won't be sorry.

My Love/Hate Relationship With Camping

Having gone camping this weekend, camping is on my mind.  It wasn't a great trip, sadly.  We got the tent up just before it began to rain and then took a drive to wait it out.  The rest of the afternoon was great.  We had blue skies and made a lovely fire (over which we made pizza pudgie pies...  NOM!).  But just as we were finishing dinner, it started to rain again.  That was around 8 or 8:30.  It rained on and off for the rest of the night.  Every time we thought it had stopped, we'd hop out of the car and sit by the fire for a minute before getting hammered again.

Around 2 AM, we got woken up (OK, Zach got woken up; I hadn't fallen asleep yet) by a park ranger because bad storms were coming our way.  We got to spend about 30 minutes in the men's bathroom with 6 other adults, two dogs (Maxi was one) and twin 3-month-olds (who were, thankfully, pretty quiet at that point).  After we got the OK to head back to camp, I just read until I was so tired I physically couldn't stay awake.  Even then, I couldn't get comfortable.  Ugh.

You'd think I'd be used to this by now, but no.  To put it nicely, I didn't grow up in a camping family.  (Actually, that's a hell of an understatement, but we'll go with it for now.)  My mom's idea of 'roughing it' when I was growing up was a motel without cable (which has since been upgraded to a hotel without room service).  Sure, Mom used to go "camping" with me as a Girl Scout, but only when it involved sleeping indoors on a mattress or bed.  The one time I went camping with my dad (for a Father's Day outing), the two of us slept in a tent so big it had room for two separate cots AND a generator so we could have a fan at night. Being slightly more outdoorsy, Dad and I actually went canoeing in the morning (because my parents owned a canoe, though I still don't know why, since that's the only time it has been used in my lifetime).

I had my first tent experience when I was about 6.  I had been going to a day camp with a few other Girl Scouts and on the last night, we got to stay over in the field next to the Girl Scout office.  I quickly learned two things.  The first is that spiders love tents, which made me terrified of the tent itself (after someone took all the visible spiders off, I was able to go into the tent, but didn't get out again until time for breakfast).  The second was that sleeping on the ground really isn't very comfortable.  I did a lot of similar day camps, but as I got older, I realized that as a Program Aid (the girls too old for the camp who were just there to lead activities) you got to sleep inside.  Since I loved the day part of day camp, it was natural for me to head in that direction.

In sixth grade, our class took a winter camping trip in February.  The things we did during the day were great; we learned to make a fire without matches and attempted to build a snow cave (though there wasn't enough snow on the ground).  The first night, I was crazy enough to actually sleep in a tent (though, instead of being on the ground, it was on a platform).  The second night I slept inside, but it was too late and I wound up sick.  It was definitely an interesting experience, but not one I'm rushing to repeat (though, the lack of spiders does make it mildly appealing).

Eventually, my mom decided I would like being a camp counselor and got me signed up for a 3-week counselor-in-training program.  Since I enjoyed being a PA so much, I should love this!  

I didn't.

I was the most homesick 15-year-old you could possibly have imagined.  I cried myself to sleep every night and wrote letters home asking Mom and Dad to come get me.  I actually got to call my parents, something that very few campers are allowed to do unless there's an emergency.  I was dead set on going home.  And then something changed.  I had made friends and was learning to enjoy camping (platform tents ftw).  I ended up staying the full 3 weeks and, much to everyone's surprise, I came back the next summer for the 4-week follow up.  

I wound up working at that camp for 4 summers.  Those summers had some of the best and worst experiences of my life and I wouldn't trade them for anything.  I made some amazing friends, had some amazing times, and (hopefully) made camp a fun place for my campers.

So while I absolutely hate rainy weather, sleeping on the uneven ground, spiders and other bugs, I also love the fresh air, the smell of trees and dirt, cooking over a fire and spending time with my hubby or good friends.  It's the biggest love/hate relationship in my life, and I can't wait to do it again in the fall.  :-)